You may be asking yourself what the heck is a scrunchy, crunchy, or silky momma?! Or maybe you are super familiar with one or two of these labels but never knew there was a third category. Being a mom on social media you are sure to come across these titles sooner or later so let me fill you in.
Here are some definitions that I found when I searched my good ole’ friend Momma Google:
Crunchy Momma: A mom who practices natural living. She is an advocate of natural birth, non or selective circumcision, not vaccinating, baby wearing, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, cloth diapering, attachment parenting, homeschooling, organic and green living.
Scrunchy Momma: A mom that is a mixture of both a silky and crunchy mom. For example, a scrunchy mommy may formula feed, and vaccinate as well as hospital birth but may use cloth diapers and make their own baby food.
Silky Momma: Modern mother who prefers medicated hospital birth, bottle feeding/part time breastfeeding, disposable diapers, crib sleeping, etc. One who follows the advice of established medical authority; often tend to be working moms who rely on modern products for convenience and time management.
So where do you find yourself? Me? I’m scrunchy! With my first baby I wanted SOOOO bad to be crunchy & it didn’t work well for me. In fact, I ended up feeling more like a failure than a success most times. I have friends who are crunchy though & they execute that lifestyle with seemingly little effort.
My second time around I let myself off the hook I had put myself on. I desired to breastfeed but wasn’t going to be depressed & feel like a milk machine for it, so I breastfed when it made me feel like I was a superhero & we were bonding. But then I would pump or give him formula for the feedings where I felt like I needed to be my own person & not have a baby latched onto me all day. This decision alone helped me with PPD [postpartum depression] it gave me some control & that helped. I have tried my best to apply this mindset in other areas as well! Sometimes we co-sleep with the babe & other times he’s in his crib. I enjoy making my own baby food from time to time but I’m not ashamed to grab some organic jarred food at the store when my life is a little more chaotic. I like to baby wear, but I also get super sweaty carrying around that little toaster so our stroller & jump-eroo are my saving grace some days. I love to buy organic when it works out, but I also have chicken nuggets in the freezer & spaghettios in the cupboard. We do limited/delayed vaccinations & we’ve had both our sons ceremonially circumcised by my husband with the direction of a Jewish Mohel. Although I love the idea of cloth diapering & planned to do so the first time around, disposable diapers officially won out in the end.
Each of these decisions work for us. We usually don’t advertise them because we don’t want to argue with anyone. The topics obviously come up though & we are happy to talk about how we came to do things the way we do & listen to others tell us what led them to do things the way they do them.
When you take a minute & look past all the titles & definitions we all have something in common: We love our kids.
I adore this Similac commercial that perfectly displays this: The Mother Hood
Everyone can easily feel a loyalty to those who do things the same way they do. It’s equally easy to be up in arms, feel threatened, & attack someone with differing views. BUT there is an alternative: Realizing that being different is beautiful & necessary for a happy life.
I sat down a couple of weeks ago with a couple of moms. One was saying how another mom had inspired her & then mentioned that she could learn from other moms. Now granted we can all learn from each other. But I looked at her & just said: “You are the kind of mom your kids need.”
Neither of us are better than the other, we are perfect for our kids. Let’s learn from each other, consistently become better, & more well rounded. But let’s also feel empowered to be the kind of mom that we naturally are. Whether you are a silky, scrunchy, or crunchy momma, if your kids know they are loved & see you respect other moms whether they fit into your “group” or not then it is my belief that you are a success.
On that note, let’s keep moving forward together, because we really are better that way.