Last week I was on vacation, trying to rest with family. It was definitely a treat to get away from the messy dishes & humdrum of regular life. However, me & the Hunky Hubby had to make a difficult decision just before our trip…he had just been hired for a new job that only had training during my side of the family’s annual reunion & his side of the family’s first ever family vacation. It was a decision that had to be made for our team awesome. With the knowledge that it would disappoint those we love AND leave me on family vacation with three littles without his help. Yes, our family would help. But family vacation didn’t end up being super relaxing. Being present was worth it. The memories we made, totally worth it. But tiring.
So I’ve been going going going for over a week.
This morning I sit on my couch, sipping coffee, & breathing. Needing the quiet. Needing to hide from the world for a hot minute. Needing to focus & try to get my crap together.
I’m looking forward. Tomorrow is the last day of one job. A job that has taken so much from him mentally & emotionally. Wednesday he begins anew. New seasons. Now is the time where we are tired from the journey & have to dig deep to pedal up the hill of transition. Determining this new season to be a good one.
The car we are about to pay off suddenly has a hand full of issues, our little lady has an ear infection, my Dad will be starting chemo before the month ends, & I have physical issues that will no longer allow being overlooked.
All of this puts me in a place of feeling like I’m a broken record. Here I am talking about how: when it rains it pours. Here I am sitting in the middle of a mess that consists of: bad luck, irresponsibility & frustration. It feels crushing. It makes me want to hide. Sell all of my things. Cry. Sleep. Repeat.
But wait, isn’t this supposed to be an affirmation post? Filled with positivity? Inspiring even? Yes.
You know what is inspiring? Someone who has all of these things going on & gets up anyway. Drinks their cup of coffee from a mug that says “Let that shit go”. Digs dip into scripture. Remembering that God is faithful, even when we are stupid & life seems to suck. There is still good. There is still hope. There is still love. There is still attainable success.
The only way to get there? Keep moving forward. Not giving up. Looking at the wreckage of life & deciding to conquer it.
As soon as we DECIDE to conquer it & not to quit, is when the conquering & the overcoming, begins.
So today, I’m readjusting. I’m shifting my attitude & my focus. & this week’s affirmation is where I’m starting:
I believe I can | So I will conquer
She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
Let’s conquer what this week has in store for us holding these things close:
Strength. Dignity. Fearlessness.
Believe! & then let’s make it happen Lovelies, as we keep moving forward.
The Mess in Me Honors the Mess in You